The Fantastic Letters Of Prof Scrub: The bubonic plague!

The bubonic plague!

Dear infected Scrubs,

Let me warn you of tht black death! Caused by my enemy - the enterobacteria Yersinia pestis, carried by the vermin that are rats! Often in my spare time, I go rat hunting, down in the sewers. I don my hunting cap, and my poachers cloak, and my big green wellies, and down into the sewers I go!

With rifle in one hand, and pipe in the other, I go rat hunting, in war with my enemy - the Pestis! The black death wiped out a third of Europe in the 14th century, many of my ancestors included - and Im here to seek revenge for their deaths.

I crawl the underground, fishing, preying, sneaking and lurching to capture those filthy rats. And as I hunt, I sing my favourite nursery rhyme:

Ring a ring o'roses
A pocketful of posies
ah-tishoo,ah-tishoo
We all fall down.

Mind you - I am very succesful. I have killed thousands of rats and have them incinerated on my logfire (they beat burning wood any time!). And there is nothing like the smell of roast rat in the evening.

Bang bang! Bang bang! If you think your hearing strange noises underground whilst you sleep at night, it maybe me, saving your life, as I single handledly attempt to erradicate Yersinia pestis!

Your human antibiotic,
Prof Scrub

I am still trying to track the leader of the rats, Splinter from te teenage mutant ninga turtles. Once I find him I will destroy him!

This entry was posted by Prof Scrub, on Monday, November 06, 2006. You can leave your response.

Anonymous | 1:07 AM |

GROUP'S 'YEAR OF THE RAT' PLEA: GIVE RATS SOMETHING TO CELEBRATE

Intelligent, Social, and Much-Maligned Animals Deserve Kindness, Says PETA

Taipei — As people around the world prepare to ring in the Year of the Rat, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals Asia-Pacific (PETA) is calling on everyone to treat rats with kindness and respect. Why? Because rats are intelligent, sensitive, and friendly animals who bear the brunt of human fears and prejudices and often end up painfully trapped, poisoned, and killed. PETA contends that people who learn about or come to know rats find out just how sweet, affectionate, and clean these animals can be.

Consider the following facts about rats:

· In Imperial Chinese culture, the rat is the first of the Chinese zodiac's 12 animals. People born in the Year of the Rat are said to possess the rat's qualities of creativity, honesty, generosity, ambition, and the ability to get along well with others.

· Rats are social animals who become attached to each other, love their families, and enjoy playing, wrestling, and sleeping curled up together.

· Rats are fastidiously clean animals who groom themselves throughout the day—they naturally have a pleasant perfume-like scent.

· Rats are smart and can learn to recognize their names and respond when they are called.

· Rats' and humans' psychology is similar in many ways. A 2007 study found that rats possess metacognition (the knowledge or awareness of one's own cognitive processes). This mental ability was previously only found in primates.

· Rats laugh and express joy. Recent studies have shown that when rats play or are playfully tickled, they make chirping sounds that are strikingly similar to human laughter. Rats who live with people often seek touch play or tickling, in much the same way that dogs and cats do.

As more laboratories are doing business in Taiwan, PETA is also calling on people to boycott companies that conduct cruel experiments on rats, such as Mars, Inc., the maker of M&M's, Snickers, Twix, Dove, 3 Musketeers, Starburst, and Skittles. Mars recently funded a deadly experiment in which rats were force-fed by having plastic tubes shoved down their throats and then had their legs cut open.

"As the Year of the Rat approaches, people around the world can open their hearts to these small animals and come to know them as complex beings who deserve kindness and consideration," says PETA's Coco Yu. "We're calling on people everywhere to boycott companies that still use rats in painful experiments and never to use harsh poisons or other cruel methods on these animals."

Anonymous | 1:07 AM |
GROUP'S 'YEAR OF THE RAT' PLEA: GIVE RATS SOMETHING TO CELEBRATE

Intelligent, Social, and Much-Maligned Animals Deserve Kindness, Says PETA

Taipei — As people around the world prepare to ring in the Year of the Rat, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals Asia-Pacific (PETA) is calling on everyone to treat rats with kindness and respect. Why? Because rats are intelligent, sensitive, and friendly animals who bear the brunt of human fears and prejudices and often end up painfully trapped, poisoned, and killed. PETA contends that people who learn about or come to know rats find out just how sweet, affectionate, and clean these animals can be.

Consider the following facts about rats:

· In Imperial Chinese culture, the rat is the first of the Chinese zodiac's 12 animals. People born in the Year of the Rat are said to possess the rat's qualities of creativity, honesty, generosity, ambition, and the ability to get along well with others.

· Rats are social animals who become attached to each other, love their families, and enjoy playing, wrestling, and sleeping curled up together.

· Rats are fastidiously clean animals who groom themselves throughout the day—they naturally have a pleasant perfume-like scent.

· Rats are smart and can learn to recognize their names and respond when they are called.

· Rats' and humans' psychology is similar in many ways. A 2007 study found that rats possess metacognition (the knowledge or awareness of one's own cognitive processes). This mental ability was previously only found in primates.

· Rats laugh and express joy. Recent studies have shown that when rats play or are playfully tickled, they make chirping sounds that are strikingly similar to human laughter. Rats who live with people often seek touch play or tickling, in much the same way that dogs and cats do.

As more laboratories are doing business in Taiwan, PETA is also calling on people to boycott companies that conduct cruel experiments on rats, such as Mars, Inc., the maker of M&M's, Snickers, Twix, Dove, 3 Musketeers, Starburst, and Skittles. Mars recently funded a deadly experiment in which rats were force-fed by having plastic tubes shoved down their throats and then had their legs cut open.

"As the Year of the Rat approaches, people around the world can open their hearts to these small animals and come to know them as complex beings who deserve kindness and consideration," says PETA's Coco Yu. "We're calling on people everywhere to boycott companies that still use rats in painful experiments and never to use harsh poisons or other cruel methods on these animals."